Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Let It Be

I often talk to my clients about reducing their attachment to an outcome. What does this mean? We want things to turn out our way. We want what we want and we want it now. The problem with this philosophy is that if we don't get what we want we are very upset. I know this sounds as if we all operate at the level of a 5 year old, but I think we all do in certain situations.

The other issue is that many people get stuck in the belief that they will not be happy if things in their life don't turn out exactly as they want. This is a big problem because if you have lived even a little while in the world, you will find out that many times things will not go the way you want.

What should you do? Reducing attachment to an outcome means that you do what you can and then let go. There is only so much you can do in any given situation. This especially applies to trying to get other people to behave the way you want.

A good example for me revolves around my daughter's grades. She will tell you that I am a pain about her grades. And she is right. I take on too much responsibility for something that is her job. I need to lessen my attachment to the outcome of her grades. It is her life and her grades.

If you find yourself too attached to someone else's behavior try the idea of "let it be."

For a particularly touching rendition of "Let It Be", listen to Paul McCartney and company sing it during a 9-11 tribute.

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